I hate to start new things. It's so damn hard to start. For me, it's probably the hardest thing out there. Every time I want to start something new I struggle hard. Really hard. I try to procrastinate as much as possible.
But I love ideas. I love writing down all of my ideas. I'm an idea hoarder. I have dozens of notepads lying around with big ideas for blog posts, books and businesses.
I used to be afraid to publish my ideas, to share them with others. I used to be afraid that people won't like them. I also used to be afraid of rejection. So I didn’t work on them; until it dawned on me that most of my ideas will remain ideas forever.
As a human with a good head on their shoulders, fear is not a bad thing to have. However, your ability to stare your fear down is what makes the champ out of you.
Eleanor Roosevelt once said many things about fear, but amongst them are these two that stand out:
- The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.
- No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.
Does fear make you fearful? It should. FDR once said that the only thing we have to fear is fear itself. Today many people are gripped by fear. They are fearful for the future of the nation (and rightly so), their company, their community, their family, their life and the list goes on.
We are fearful of what we don’t know or understand. We are also fearful of what we can’t control. The economy is something most people can’t understand and even fewer people can control it.
Fear can be healthy if it saves your life; if you take a step back from taking wrong decisions because of the fear of its consequences. It is, however, unhealthy when it paralyzes you and keeps you from thinking and making right decisions.
The weapons to conquer fear are many but we’ll discuss these 3:
Look fear in the eye. Oftentimes, what we fear isn’t the reality of a thing, but the image of a thing. If we try and see our fears for what they really are we often become less afraid or lose that fear entirely. A roaring lion suddenly becomes a purring kitten. And fortunately, all fears are not created equal. Some are useful, and some are useless fears that you can't or shouldn't do anything about. They sap your strength for no reason, and you should put those fears in their place. Worrying about a comet striking Earth falls into this category.
Your ability to confront, deal with, and act in spite of your fears is the key to happiness and success. One of the best exercises you can practice is to identify a person or situation in your life of which you are afraid and resolve to deal with that fear situation immediately. Do not allow it to make you unhappy for another minute. Resolve to confront the situation or person and put the fear behind you.
2.Test your fears.
Overcoming fears can be compared to swimming for the first time. (Or second, or twentieth, depending on who you are.) You stick your toe in, and it is shockingly cold at first, but then you sit there for a while with your legs in. Then step by step you get in until you are swimming underwater. You are no longer afraid because you tried it. So go ahead and try it!
You can’t know everything, and you can’t control everything. Accept it! Roll with it. It is amazing how once you give those two facts that your fears just vanish. Embracing your fear and then letting it go is one of the most effective ‘antifear’ tricks I've found. The only way to deal with fear is to address it head-on. Remind yourself that, “Denial” is not a river in Egypt.
The natural tendency of many people is to deny that they have a problem caused by fear of some kind. They’re afraid of confronting it. In turn, it becomes a major source of stress, unhappiness, and psychosomatic illness. Be willing to deal with the situation or person directly.
Finally, realize that you are good enough to succeed. Why do we try to live up to everyone else’s standards but our own? Fear won’t hold you back if you tell yourself you are good enough to be yourself, to achieve that set goal and that your preparation will not go to waste. It shows that you have self-confidence and integrity. I can’t tell you how many people need to hear these exact words. “You have permission to be yourself and be great at it.” For whatever reason, many of us were raised in such a way that we needed permission to be ourselves. The biggest thing you can do for yourself and those around you is to tell them it’s ok to be their special unique selves and still be capable of creating something great. Do it in words and action. You won’t know how much energy that releases until you try it, so go out there and just do it!